I am such a tool.

I was on with a new friend last night, he is a European Model,HOT,crazy sexy cool. Wise well beyond his years, he makes me laugh and think. I really want to meet him, he lives nearby, but I have to admit he intimidates me. He is handsome and funny, hella sexy, and way more together than I am right now. He cracks on me for hanging out on Gay . com, and I admit I prolly deserve it. I was on last night with another guy while I was chatting with him - the guy asks if I "PNP". (Plug n Play??) I'm stupified LOL!! So I am looking it up on google - yes I am that uneducated! ROTFLMAO! So SexyMod tells me what it is, TOO FUNNY! Ugh. And no.. I do not do drugs, I only act like I do. He thinks I am an idiot no doubt. He is probably right.

Life is exploding for me right now, so many things I don't know it is daunting, scary, hot, LORD! I am a big gay Forest Gump. I was on later with my
Crunch , who is also so much wiser than I - and I realized there is so much I need to learn yet. I'm like one of those calves you see on the learning channel - stumbling all over the place.

SexyMod has already been through all this, so has my Crunch.. and everyone else. I knew I would have dues to pay, just never expected I would be so slow to get up to speed. So tell me, how long does it take to behave like a rational human being again. I wasn't this awkward when I was 13.

Off to the gym.. to ponder and sweat.